Lately, as I've been out and about with Russell on walks or in shopping malls, I've made a very frustrating observation: the men are not moving. Let me explain.
In one instance I was walking on the right side of the sidewalk and a couple of men were walking towards me going in the opposite direction. Neither of them made any attempt to move over for the mother and her baby but kept walking straight as if I wasn't there. Out of curiosity for what might happen, I stayed the course as well and the man closest to me ended up bumping into the stroller with a grunt. He gave me a look like "how dare you take up my space." In that instant I secretly had the desire to mow him over completely. Is stepping down off the curb such a sacrifice??!!
On another occasion, I was shopping in the mall and Russ was just having an "I'm hungry so feed me right now or I'll keep screaming in your face!" type of fit. So I looked around for a seating area so I could make him a bottle. I'm not joking, in every single area a single man sat in the middle of the bench with arms and legs outstretched as though claiming the area entirely. Finally, unable to find any free space, I just sat down beside one of them; I was sitting so close, because the punk wouldn't move, that it looked as though he had his arm around me. Yet still he held his ground and looked as though he was about to get up at any moment to pee all over the bench to mark his territory!!
I sure hope this isn't a trend among male strangers out there who have formed some sort of "say no to motion" unspoken agreement signaled by hormones or pheromones or secret hand shakes or who knows what. Tis the season to move over, okay? Like Nike says, "Just do it."
J
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I can't believe the guy on the bench didn't even move! Geesh!!
ReplyDeleteI've wanted to do what you've done when people are in the same line of path as me, but usually end up moving, or I'll stop completely and look kind of annoyed so they can (hopefully) realize that I have no where to go and that it would be nice for them to move a little!
I think Santa needs to bring you some nerf guns with that deadly accuracy of yours. I should know because I have been a victim of it.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure Ken can come up with a holster to mount to the side of Russell's stroller. Then have a small pouch beside it that has some crazy glue to put on the tip of the darts. What will make this more effective is if you write "dumbie" backwards on the dart, so that when they return home to try and remove the super glued dart from their forehead in the bathroom mirror, the entire time they will be forced to view your small reminder of what they really are...atleast when they are in the path of a mother and her stroller refusing to move out of the way!