When we got to the hospital we were instantly set up in a triage room. The nurse then had the audacity to ask, "Why are you here?" I knew she was just doing her job but, seriously, are you blind? I'M HAVING A FREAKING BABY! I didn't have the patience to answer any of her questions after she offended me with the first so I remained mute while Ken spoke for me. Meanwhile, down the hall, I could hear a group of nurses chatting and laughing (and quite loudly I might add) which only further kindled my anger. What is this? A party on the third floor PLC prenatal triage unit? Come on people. I am not laughing through this contraction, therefore, you shall not laugh...EVER. These were the type of thoughts running through my brain but I neither had the energy nor the focus to actually speak them out loud. I was preoccupied with other matters like willing my cervix to dilate as quickly as possible.
My Jedi skills must have worked because when the doctor finally came to check me I was 7cm dilated and I had only been in triage for 30 minutes! They asked me if I wanted an epidural but by the time I got to the labour and delivery room I was 8cm dilated so I decided to just go with the pain. Plus, there was no way I would be able to lean over and stay still while they shoved a needle down my back.
Don't think that Ken was doing nothing all that while. Well, actually, he was doing nothing, but that's only because I wouldn't let him touch me or talk to me. I barely even opened my eyes through the whole labour ( I found out afterwards when I looked in the mirror that this was because my eye lids were crazy swollen). However, he did serve as a good water and ice chip boy...which was much appreciated.
Finally the moment came: a 10cm dilation and the urge to push. I was so excited! Little did I know that I would be pushing for an hour and a half. I swear in all the movies, the girl gives like 5 good pushes and the baby's out. Was it so unrealistic to expect the same thing? Push after push the doctor kept saying, "You're almost there." By the 20th push I was convinced that she was a compulsive liar, that the baby's head wasn't "right there" and that they would soon have to suction my poor baby out of my lifeless body. But then, eureka, with one last push, the baby shot out (quite literally) and I was soon holding the most adorable blob of goo and amniotic fluid I had ever seen. After 6 1/2 hours of labour, 25 stitches and a plethora of broken blood vessels, Ken and I were gushing over the newest addition to the family. Introducing Russell Ross Conrad - lately pronounced "Wussell Woss". We're going to give our kid a speech impediment but, hey, he's alive...for now.
J
My Jedi skills must have worked because when the doctor finally came to check me I was 7cm dilated and I had only been in triage for 30 minutes! They asked me if I wanted an epidural but by the time I got to the labour and delivery room I was 8cm dilated so I decided to just go with the pain. Plus, there was no way I would be able to lean over and stay still while they shoved a needle down my back.
Don't think that Ken was doing nothing all that while. Well, actually, he was doing nothing, but that's only because I wouldn't let him touch me or talk to me. I barely even opened my eyes through the whole labour ( I found out afterwards when I looked in the mirror that this was because my eye lids were crazy swollen). However, he did serve as a good water and ice chip boy...which was much appreciated.
Finally the moment came: a 10cm dilation and the urge to push. I was so excited! Little did I know that I would be pushing for an hour and a half. I swear in all the movies, the girl gives like 5 good pushes and the baby's out. Was it so unrealistic to expect the same thing? Push after push the doctor kept saying, "You're almost there." By the 20th push I was convinced that she was a compulsive liar, that the baby's head wasn't "right there" and that they would soon have to suction my poor baby out of my lifeless body. But then, eureka, with one last push, the baby shot out (quite literally) and I was soon holding the most adorable blob of goo and amniotic fluid I had ever seen. After 6 1/2 hours of labour, 25 stitches and a plethora of broken blood vessels, Ken and I were gushing over the newest addition to the family. Introducing Russell Ross Conrad - lately pronounced "Wussell Woss". We're going to give our kid a speech impediment but, hey, he's alive...for now.
J
Love the story of how he came into the world! I love to hear L&D stories! :) I'd love to see you guys and your little man sometime!
ReplyDeleteI am always amazed when people know how long each stage of their L&D was. After they broke my water, I can't really tell you anything between that and the baby coming out. Bits and pieces come to mind, but I honestly don't know how long I was pushing! It was such an outer body and surreal experience for me during those few hours. haha